Thursday, February 19, 2009

Out of the Mouths of Babes

“My mom watches PLAYBOY”

Ummm, that’s not exactly the kind of information that I like my daughter to be sharing with anybody… ESPECIALLY not her teacher. And what was my surprise when she came home telling me that she told her teacher that!
Why did you tell your teacher that?
Because you do!
Aaaaaaah! I could not believe her. There was no way in hell that she actually told her teacher that, right?
Because she did!
Of course she did…
Why wouldn’t she?
(shaking my head here full of embarrassment, looking down, hands covering my eyes & most of my face)

My first thought was Oh no she didn’t.
But sadly enough, Oh yes she did.
And that my friends just goes to show you and reiterate the point that I am SuperMom……….. NOT!
There’s no doubt in my mind that that’s definitely what her teacher’s thinking. That I’m a bad, bad mother. I’m sure she went home & told her husband all about me. I can just hear her now… “That poor, poor child. Not only does her mother watch Playboy, she can’t keep it to herself. Her daughter knows all about it… Poor thing, she must be addicted. She probably doesn’t get much action with her husband that she had to resort to porn.” LOL!

I can just imagine all the things she must be thinking! It’s funny & embarrassing to even think about it!
Funny because it is soooo not true! Yet embarassing because she must surely think it is!
Oh my Lord… How will I ever see her in the eyes again? Haha, will she look me in the eyes? After all, she’s probably just as embarrassed that she ‘knows’ about my little secret!

And let’s just set the record straight here people.
I do NOT watch porn.
I am NOT addicted.
And I DO get lots & lots of action from my gorgeous hubby (thank you very much!)
(t.m.i. Yeah, I know, but I gotta set the record straight here)

What my sweet, precious, loud-mouth daughter was referring to was Playboy’s “The Girls Next Door”. Now that show I do watch every once in a while, definitely not to be confused with the Playboy channel… but I’m sure that’s not what the teacher imagined! From now on I’m sure she’ll be referring to as the ‘Mom who watches Playboy channel & her daughter knows all about it, and now I do too’

Yup, that’s me!


Diane said...

Too funny!! It reminds me of when my daughter organized my magazines for me when she was about 6. She said, "Mama, the house magazines are here, Oprah is here, and your sex magazines are here." I said, "Ummm... honey? My sex magazines?" She pointed to the stack of Glamour and Cosmos, every single one of which had the word SEX on the cover. I burst out laughing and made sure she understood fully that she was NOT to tell people I read sex mags! ;)

Jen - Balancing Beauty and Bedlam said...

Ok - that is totally a bedlam moment. Let us know what happens when you finally talk to the

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